Sometimes we get so caught up in our own world that we are blind to the world around us. We get caught up in our own lives and situations that we forget to look about us and see the wonder God gives us and forget how truly blessed we are in the circumstances we are in. David’s health has been front and center these last two and a half weeks. It has been a roller coaster ride of highs and lows, constant thinking about what is next and what the future holds.
On the way to church David called me this morning to find out what I was doing. I explained I was just turning into the church parking lot and asked what was up. A very upset David explained his brain was bleeding and proceeded to go on a rant about the plans moving forward and when was I getting there to sort all of this out and set everyone straight and bring him home.
A brain bleed? We had all wondered and discussed this as we also discussed the ICU psychosis. Nothing had been confirmed and no results from yesterday’s scans had been shared as of yet. As I entered church, I met one of the family and briefly mentioned the call. We both kind of wrote it off to David not exactly hearing things right with his mind not connecting things. I quickly texted his cardiologist and set myself in the pew for the service which I had come to worship in.
By the time I sat in the pew, I was overwhelmed and numb. I made it through the offering and soon the message for the day was being delivered. As I watched and listed to Rick Pyle, a Firefighter and EMT I would learn, was sharing his missionary story of recent. I watched the pictures and listened to what he had seen, one particular picture and story caught my attention above all else. A woman came into the clinic with chest pains. Through simple ingenuity, they relieved her and later that day were able to send her home. What really caught me was his statement that most would die with the heart attack because of the health care system in place and the lack of good health care.
I opened my heart’s eyes for the first time to realize that so many have such a great need and my circumstances, though mine, were under control. Not only is David in a good hospital with great Staff and doctors, but he is also in God’s hands. This woman of Rick’s story was not so lucky, though with Rick’s Team, they were able to save one more starfish from dying on the beach. (He told the story of the starfish on the beach that the man would throw in and save at least what he could from dying.)
Then I realized how God had our situation under control and yet there are so many who are helpless and do not know our God. As we heard the list of prayer requests of those to be lifted I remembered that we are God’s children and our job is to pray for one another. Whether it is a young girl who will continue to undergo surgeries for a long time to come – #KatyStrong, a young girl who is fighting from a head on collision or a complication of a pregnancy, there will always be someone to pray for and someone in a worse place than we are.
David does have a bleed, though minor, it is a concern. Our visit with him today was good and he was a bit more settled once we arrived. He wants his razor, he wants water to drink from the spring and he was for the most part quieter about his stories. I ache for him being there and not understanding what and when. He does not understand that he must heal before the next steps.
He underwent another brain scan with contrast today to check on the bleed. The results are that it is minor, though we have not been told if it is new or old. So, we wait some more. Compared to the people in Rick’s stories, we are blessed! Blessed in so many ways. David’s situation could have been so much different without God’s plan and without God having us where we are in this moment, in this place and where we are geographically.
So, as I close the day, completely and utterly exhausted, I praise God he has this plan he has not revealed. But as I retire and spend my prayer time, I will ask God to bless those less fortunate, those who are in worse shape than David and those who support, heal, take care of, and provide in situations where others grow weary and numb, overwhelmed and depressed. My blind faith in God’s plan will get us through and God will provide answers in His time and not ours. My human faith still has me on edge, that I cannot deny. Stress, anxiety, panic, they are mine and though I try to give it all to God, they still ebb and flow, come and go.
This bleed is very concerning, but then I begin to think about Jesus. Weird and randomly I began to envision Jesus’ hands with nails and his feet. I thought about Easter not far away and the events leading up to Easter. I will ponder these thoughts. Drops of blood. David’s bleed, my mother’s stroke, accident victims, pregnant mothers, all dealing with blood, but the one who is the way, the truth, the light and the life will guide us all, if only we believe He will! What pain He must have felt, all for us to take away our pain and save us!
If it bleeds, there is a scar of some kind left behind. The bleeding stops and healing begins. That scar should serve as rememberance of the event and help us to remember how far we have come and how far we have yet to go. David has come a long way and he has a long road to go. God is with us, just as he is with you in whatever comes your way. Believe, trust, obey!